Smilewhores

Doctor Baby MD

2012-01-08T18:39:00.000-08:00

WHoooaaa

2012-01-08T18:34:00.001-08:00

This is just a reminder that I have moved this site, and all my new comics to:

www.sweatypenny.com!

DONT YOU LOOK AT ME

Another comic!

2009-08-07T17:07:00.000-07:00

You guys, guess what! I did another comic, but its not here.

It is at my other site! www.sweatypenny.com!!

CHECK IT OUT OKAY

My friends!

2009-08-06T05:27:00.000-07:00

Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend me your peepers. Listen - so I bought some hosting, and I used this crazy program called "comic press" to put up the comic you have come to loathe over at www.sweatypenny.com . So please come over and take a look! I even have a proper archive! I will be working on the site, but will be still updating regularly. I would also like to apologize for how shitty the last comic was. So come over, update your bookmarks, and if you feel like spreading the misery, tell your friends!

cheers

Keir

Autowhat

2009-08-04T20:09:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-08-04

Guys - what is going on?

Latin Adventures

2009-08-02T19:44:00.000-07:00

I bumped down the size a bit ...
does this help? do..do you like me now?

By keirbot at 2009-08-02

Preliminary Sketches for comic

2009-08-02T19:42:00.000-07:00

Check it out!

By keirbot at 2009-08-02

WAT

2009-07-31T17:40:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-07-31

so listen! baby times have been busy times, but I will be resuming regular comics monday ... I am trying to work on a kids book, figure out how to paint properly in photoshop, battle an addiction to card games that I have no one to play with and also my wife and I have forgotten the meaning of the word sleep. So please forgive this trespass, as I have forgiven your trespasses - I know all 3 of you are thoroughly disappointed! Plus, I have this guy who might be trying to make me a REAL WEBSITE, WITH BUTTONS N' EVERYTHING. He is a total dreamboat for sure. He will probably request sexual favors though, so we will see how that goes. That way - when you know, you want to see one of my thoroughly shitty comics, all you have to do is look at the "archives". Friggin crazy huh!

Anyway.. yeah. Thanks for reading!

The Wizard

2009-07-29T13:21:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-07-29

Guys! HERE IS A COMIC FRESH FOR YOUR PEEPERS

also - don't look too closely at the terrible backgrounds in each panel, this goes double for you, JOE.

Pikachu, the Waffen SS calls you!!

2009-07-24T20:01:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-07-24
What if Pikachu was invented by the Nazi's as a secret weapon????
...

I am sorry for this image.

update: this is not what I was cooking up

Bees

2009-07-23T17:59:00.001-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-07-23

whew - baby time is crazy

update: I just realized that in the first panel he calls the bee with glasses "Phil" but in the last panel he calls him "Daniel"
it almost seems funnier considering he is a bee and is dumb?

Killer Filler

2009-07-21T20:09:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 200-07-13"

Dont judge me - I have stuff brewin'

JUST YOU WAIT

Devolution

2009-07-19T20:43:00.001-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-07-19

is that even a word? loosely based on true events

Klassic Keir Komix

2009-07-16T17:40:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 200-07-13

guys - sorry, it has been really friggin busy lately
its an oldie but a goodie - I am looking into getting a proper website so I can actually put up all the comics I have ever done and maybe even get on some sort of a storyline with characters n' shit, without the shitty blog format.

Oh shit!

2009-07-13T18:29:00.000-07:00

Victor - I still owe you twenty bucks!

Mentos

2009-07-13T11:44:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-07-13

I don't know where I was going with this

Big ups to Mr Seah - a true interweb prince

Haha oh you haxx0rz

2009-07-10T19:12:00.000-07:00

looks like imageshax was haxx..z0rd? however the fuck you want to spell it.
If anyone knows how to "make a website" that I can just upload a comic +words that will auto archive .. please let me know.

This may or may not have happened.

2009-07-10T18:35:00.000-07:00

I did this comic for a certain Desmond Seah but then I posted it on my own site, defeating the purpose. But listen - the moral of the story is that I am sick of refreshing his website and having nothing new pop up.

By keirbot at 2009-07-10

I am ruining the internet with my comics.

wha

2009-07-08T20:14:00.001-07:00

why no update?? who cares
also - check back tomorrow afternoon, comix times will be upon us

Baby time is all the time

2009-07-06T20:01:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-07-06

BASED ON A TRUE STORY

Shakespeare in space? okay.

2009-07-04T21:20:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-07-05

that is me in grade 10 tryin' to figure out how to read a Shakespearean play

update: changed the wording - I cant write for shit

One day, on the way to the comic shoppe...

2009-07-01T19:49:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-07-01

tee hee

also - a big HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO VICTOR NORTH

I HOPE IT IS A HAPPY DAY FOR HIM

I ALSO HOPE HE GETS A HAIRCUT FOR HIS BIRTHDAY CAUSE' HE NEEDS ONE

The Pancake Revolution!

2009-06-30T08:38:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-06-30

Death to the bourgeois crepe okay guys?

Also - new babies are neat!

Hello friends!

2009-06-27T06:28:00.001-07:00

I am sorry for the lack of comic today - but it is for a good reason! I am the proud new father of a little girl by the name of Ruari :)
So! It may be a day or two before I get something up!!
Thanks for the patience lads/lasses

~Keir

the ballad of Ronald McDonald

2009-06-24T20:36:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-06-24

whatever became of the ol' hamburgler anyway?

Train Tyme

2009-06-22T20:26:00.001-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-06-22

Harken back, yo' - to the days of lasers

A boy and his crappy comic

2009-06-20T08:01:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-06-20

SO WHAT

Moooomm

2009-06-17T19:53:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-06-17

GRAPE SODA YOU GUYS

The most dangerous catch?

2009-06-15T19:19:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-06-15

THE BARRAGE OF SHIT BEGINS. 3 times a week - no matter how shitty it is! AND POSSIBLY COLOUR SUNDAYS.

TO SETTLE THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL

2009-06-13T09:09:00.001-07:00

This is a portrait of Vice Admiral Horatio Nelson - British Flag Officer

The French Admiral Villeneuve also wore a blue coat - BUT FOR THE PURPOSE OF THE COMIC, I chose to make him wear a red coat. I hope we can all move past this now, JOE.

Fitter, happier, more productive... a pig, in a cage, on antibiotics.

2009-06-12T08:34:00.000-07:00

because I am incapable of making my own decision without consulting the precious few, those brave souls who read this drivel - I have decided on a 3 comix per week (b&w) with a possible longer comic update on sundays...

I hope you filthy people are happy. Get ready for a non stop barrage of shit.

Hello again!

2009-06-10T07:48:00.000-07:00

So listen - you guys
I realize that I have not been updating AS MUCH as I should, but! It is because I want to make sure my comics are okay, and not as terrible as they normally are? I am trying to decide between a daily format (i.e mon to fri) with mono colour - OR, like a once a week epic comic? fuck man - I don't know.
What do YOU think?

Bustin' a move on the high seas!

2009-06-02T20:48:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-06-02

A little history lesson for you all. LET THIS BE A LESSON.

I seriously gotta move this site to like, an actual website. This blogging shit is ridiculous! I would write more but I do believe my eyeballs are seconds away from hatching an escape plan.

Set course for yo' momma

2009-05-26T21:09:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-05-26

whew! done.

Oi!

2009-05-26T10:02:00.001-07:00

Sorry for the delay guys - I am a shitty comic guy for sure!
I should have a new comic for you guys either tonight or tomorrow!

True Story: Age 7

2009-05-18T15:50:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-05-18

The worst part of this is the only reason I wanted that Batman cape was for the Batman I had at home who was WITHOUT a cape. So you can imagine the dilemma I was in. My stars.

Man alive - was I transparent though, as soon as I had smuggled the Batman cape out of the school and out from under the prying eyes of my Teacher and classmates - I subsequently blurted out as I got into the car "MOM YOU WOULDNT BELIEVE WHAT SOMEONE DID. SOMEONE STOLE BATMANS CAPE. (pause) BUT IT WASNT ME."

I'm sure it helped that as soon as I got through the front door I went flying into my room with my schoolbag in tow, only to take the Batman cape out immediately, and fit it onto the Batman figure I had, who had been missing a cape for months (which I had complained loudly about for just as long.) My mother, of course, opened the door and busted me. I had to write a letter of apology to my Grade 3 teacher for stealing the Batman cape. True story.

Vict-whore

2009-05-11T08:34:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-05-09

Man I just put this up yesterday, your comics are OLD Victor - and as such, I am putting this ahead of your comics from 1998.

Also, what 20 bucks?

IAMF page 25

2009-05-11T08:07:00.000-07:00

Where the hells my 20 bucks?

Here's a whole slew of old comics RETROACTIVELY

take THAT!

Argh

2009-05-09T13:45:00.000-07:00

So listen! I fell behind, again. I have had a comic ready to go since wed - but have not had time to colour it! Scandalous, I know. All three of you are very disappointed I am sure. However, today I went to the Toronto Comic Arts Festival and let me tell you. It was ROCKIN'. You guys have no idea? I saw a ton of people, FROM THE INTERNET, like Ryan North of Dinosaur Comix who was looking tall and handsome, as ever. As well as a slew of other people from Disel Sweeties, Hark! A Vagrant, and pictures for sad children and also A Softer World. I am telling you it was crazy. I felt embarrassed being there, like they could smell my interweb failure and might ferret me out like some sort of internet pariah that accidentally stumbled into a secret council of hilarity. Or something to that effect. Anyway - it was rad and inspirational and also I borrowed $20 from Victor to buy this and then totally never gave it back to him before I left! I am the greatest friend anyone could ask for, and he better not forget it.

IAMF page 24

2009-05-05T08:06:00.000-07:00

Moon Adventures

2009-05-04T19:47:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-05-04

Guys, I am not feeling so great - I think I have the Moon Flu.

IAMF page 23

2009-05-01T08:04:00.000-07:00

Kings Quest IV: Quest for the dictonary

2009-04-29T20:15:00.001-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-04-30
haaaa
what I love is that there is a higher chance of you slipping in your bathtub and killing yourself than there is of dying from Swine Flu.

IAMF page 22

2009-04-29T01:00:00.000-07:00

This is almost worse than not posting any comic at all

2009-04-28T19:40:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-04-28

oh my goodness

2009-04-28T05:54:00.000-07:00

guys it has been a super long time - and again I apologize. You see, I have what doctors have termed "TERMINAL VIDEOGAMEITIS". Meaning I play way too many games and squander pretty much every opportunity I get to work on comics or anything related to being productive. I don't know what my problem is, really. It seems really weird that someone (i.e myself) would, instead of working towards a goal that could potentially be rewarding in the future and rewarding in the immediate (i.e having worked to finish something) I would choose to do something that offers intangible rewards - essentially, a fake accomplishment. I mean, honestly. What am I going to put on my resume?

Keir Broadfoot

SKILL SETS

- Can beat Call of Duty 5 on the hardest setting.
- Is pretty good at Super Mario 1,2 and 3, without using Warp Whistles.
- Can beat Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 1 for the Nintendo Entertainment System only using Raphael.
- Can beat the race level on Battletoads without using Game Genie.

Like, for fuck sakes. What am I doing with my life?

Comic update tonight.

By keirbot

Meanwhile - enjoy this picture of Batman slapping Robin.

IAMF page 21

2009-04-20T07:58:00.000-07:00

BLING BLING

2009-04-18T19:34:00.001-07:00

OKAY FINE VICTOR - A NEW COMIC.

By keirbot at 2009-04-18

I think this is something you actually came up with awhile back that I always meant to make into a comic...

However - the last panel ACTUALLY HAPPENED

IAMF page 20

2009-04-17T21:21:00.000-07:00

...THAT, KEIR?

IAMF page 19

2009-04-17T21:20:00.000-07:00

SORRY? WHAT'S...

HUFF N' STUFF

2009-04-17T15:43:00.001-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-04-17

Victor

2009-04-17T15:35:00.000-07:00

you whore.

IAMF page 18

2009-04-17T14:47:00.000-07:00

*Cough*

IAMF page 17

2009-04-17T14:44:00.000-07:00

What was that?

Did somebody say something?

awh, it was probably something I heard before anyway...

Guys I am the worst comic guy of all time

2009-04-17T09:09:00.000-07:00

Okay so listen up! I have been working non-stop for the last two weeks and I almost died fighting an octo-shark. On the upside, I made a ton of $$ in overtime - on the downside, I have had no time for anything else. This is not to say that you should despair! Because I am in fact much rested now and I have many ideas that are probably not so hilarious to put into comic form. So in the mean time, yet AGAIN, please enjoy this classic HPB.

Also, Victor I can't hear you over the sound of you sucking so friggin' bad.

By keirbot at 2009-04-17

This actually happened.

IAMF page 16

2009-04-10T11:53:00.000-07:00

What that Keir? You'll have to speak up! I can't hear you over the sound of me posting another comic!

Victor

2009-04-06T16:15:00.000-07:00

WHA-T

I just put that comic up like, last night!!

Quit hoggin', man. It's like you are sassing me with OLD COMIX!!

WHERE IS YOUR NEW MATERIAL VICTORB

IAMF page 15

2009-04-06T15:26:00.000-07:00

GUYS LISTEN

2009-04-05T19:52:00.001-07:00

you probably all need to check this out

TINY BIKES

it..it relates to tiny bikes and those that ride them

Biker flies on tiny bikes

2009-04-05T15:16:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-04-05

Haaaa

AH Victor, your logic is.. IMPECCABLE. Also, slightly irritating!

BUT WHATEVER. Here is a fresh comic for you all to feast your peepers on. Go on, don't be shy. Take a gander.

IAMF page 14

2009-04-04T06:41:00.000-07:00

Haha! AND HERE IS A'nudder ONE!

IAMF page 13

2009-04-04T06:19:00.000-07:00

TWO old comics!

Keir. These are awesome (esp. Soccer MacGyver) but you are now officially not allowed to say "boo" about me putting up old comics!

At least mine are new to the internets!

Tales of Keir's childhood - reprise

2009-03-31T18:15:00.000-07:00

Okay - since I can't find my wacom tablet pen NOR can I come up with any decent ideas for new comics as of yet, I am harkening back to the days of YORE. Also, because CT Bob asked.
Enjoy. Or not.

I'm not the boss of you.

By keirbot at 2009-03-31

True story.

So listen

2009-03-27T06:19:00.001-07:00

Okay maybe the last couple comix have been fairly terrible - I am pretty sure that this is the case. LISTEN I AM OUT OF INSPIRATION OKAY. Like a drunk, who has run of refreshing and delicious whiskey.

What I am trying to say is that I am thirsty.

For adventure! Also, inspiration!

Maybe you guys have some extra inspiration laying around that I can maybe haul away for you?

I will be trying harder in the future to come up with better written garbage on a more regular basis - however, this is very time consuming. I had am email from Victor yesterday in which he stated that he wished he had a time machine. Not so that he could go back in time, though. But rather - so that he could generate extra time, as there is never enough time in the day. To this, I agreed. As well, my new computer just came in yesterday. I misread what kind of PC chassis I was buying for my new "rig" - and ended up with a server case the size of a small donkey.

Do they make donkey's in different sizes?

..

Some donkey's are bigger than others.

Also - I hope you guys are all aware that (link)"God 'will not give happy ending. You remember that the next time you offer God an extra 20$ under the table. Not worth it.

Oh man

2009-03-25T20:11:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-03-25

Inspired by a recent news article that I can no longer find.

Also, my comics are starting to make less and less sense as I lose my grip on reality.

update: WAT?

In a Handful of Minutes!

2009-03-22T10:08:00.001-07:00

You guys (all 6 of you) should go take a gander at A Handful of Minutes!. It is pretty friggin' rad and also I did some illustrations for the illustrious Oliver! He gave me some big ups, but the ups are all HIS. I don't really know what I mean.
But go check it out, yo. Funny shtuff!

Also check out this comic - it is an OLDIE BUT A GOODIE.

By keirbot at 2009-03-22

haha just kidding - it is terrible.

HAY

2009-03-21T17:42:00.000-07:00

YOU GUYS ANOTHER WEEK HAS PASSED AND I ONLY DID ONE COMIC WHAT IS GOING ON

Belly Towne

2009-03-16T19:36:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-03-16

OH man - I am growing the biggest belly of all time.. what is the deal with that anyway?! I gave up having a little drinky-poo once or twice or thrice a week, and this is my reward! A belly that is too fast and also too furious to stop growing. Speaking of which, I hope you are as excited as I am for the new Vin Disel movie "Fast and Furious". You know, as opposed to "Moderately paced and rational".

Also - listen, I am sorry if my last post mislead you into thinking this comic post would be good.

Because I assure you it is not. However! I am always hoping to improve the filth I serve up to you on a weekly basis. To make it more.. palatable - I guess.

You guys!

2009-03-15T12:22:00.000-07:00

So listen - I have been super busy this week! I was doing a training course, and also I went to a concert that was pretty rockin'! Which means I HAVE BEEN TOTALLY NEGLECTFUL OF MY COMIC. I hope you are all cool with this! I also like how I said that I did two things so automatically it means I have NO TIME FOR ANYTHING ELSE. I hope this is believable. Anyway - I will be comic'n tonight and hopefully have some more sloppy material up in the next day or so!

Space Pony Adventure

2009-03-08T20:03:00.000-07:00

By keirbot at 2009-03-08

so very tired - I hate you stupid day light savings!!

Last comicjam comic

2009-03-07T18:01:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-03-07

haha! OKAY THIS IS THE LAST ONE FOR REALS - Victor and I have teamed up to reach for the stars, and we have succeeded, dare I say. Laughs were had, giggles were stolen and abused thoroughly. That is how we roll. More or less.

I will be back monday with moar comixs

ComicJam 4: Ontario comix are the worst comix

2009-03-02T17:49:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-03-02

most of this comic is based on things that are very true

ComicJam 3: A cold wash of reality

2009-02-27T20:00:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-02-27

ha haaa

you see, the shirt thinks he is going back in time via the washing machine - I also love his little spectacles denoting that he is somehow smarter than the average shirt.

ComicJam 2: Sweet surrender

2009-02-24T17:39:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-02-24

haha! I like how I am naked in the last panel - thanks Victor.

I also love how in the last panel, Victor's eye's are hypnotized by my penis. It tends to have that effect.

Comicjam 1: hardboiled breakfest detective

2009-02-22T15:59:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-02-2
This is from a comicjam Victor and I did this Sunday (today) in which we took turns drawing the panels - which explains why they are so friggin' funny.
Victor: this is why you need to do more comics - your panels are solid gold. Solid.

lol eggbatman

IAMF page 12

2009-02-20T14:12:00.000-08:00

Victor go boom boom

2009-02-17T19:46:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-02-17

Victor - I command you to leave this up for at least 2 days before you post over it!! I COMMAND THEE

IAMF page 11

2009-02-16T11:22:00.000-08:00

Spooky tales

2009-02-15T16:44:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-02-15

600KB of pure, unaltered, digital filth. Eat it. Eat it you filthy animals.
Man - so I just got over the flu this week. Good times. Let me tell you.

So listen - I heard that some guy just pushed some people (teenagers) in front of the subway in Toronto. Way to report on one of my all time favourite paranoia's, mass media! Geez. But in a rare stroke of sensual fortune/skill - these guys totally didn't meet an untimely demise, they like.. rolled under the train or something. Hardcore.

As well -
this.
Let me just say - ha HAA. This is some Maury Povich shit, English style.

IAMF page 10

2009-02-11T10:47:00.000-08:00

Moustache hero

2009-02-08T18:51:00.001-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-02-08

haha like, why would I even meet up with Tom Selleck??

That is my favourite part, the unanswered questions.

Also, my shitty moustache.

IAMF page 9

2009-02-04T10:26:00.001-08:00

Zombie finale

2009-02-03T20:39:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-02-03

whew! Never had a comic delivered so little to so few!

Also - what the shit is up with movies these days. "Space Buddies". A movie - in which the plot is sending puppies into outer space. Why? What possible purpose can this serve? I am sure NASA, with all its loads of space dollars, sees no problem with this. What the hell are the puppies going to do in space anyway? They are going to shit in their space suits and that is going to be it.

Listen, this is really upsetting me. I .. I dont get it.

IAMF page 8

2009-01-30T15:12:00.000-08:00

Zombie time

2009-01-29T20:59:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-01-29

Sorry this took so long to post! Also - I continue to fail at punchlines and life.
Also is the plot line of "the Pink Panther" just Steve Martin falling down for 2 hours?

Guys

2009-01-29T07:21:00.000-08:00

A new comic is coming - It is really long tho and is taking a million years to "colour". 'I say "colour" but there is only like - shades of grey and blue. I should have finished it last night, but I was busy beating the pants off of Fallout 3. I wish I had a V.A.T.S pipboy in real life. I would use it to eat my mac n' cheese with unprecedented accuracy. Anyhow - please enjoy Victor's crazy comic about him wishing he had a hoverboard. Hey McVictor, you bojo, those boards don't work on water! Unless you've got POWER!

IAMF page 7

2009-01-26T15:03:00.000-08:00

I am the mayor of doodlesville

2009-01-25T19:08:00.001-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-01-25

I was drawin' some skulls today, and also a robot who has learned to love!
This is what doodling is about, I guess. Variety?

IAMF page 6

2009-01-24T15:01:00.000-08:00

BEE COOL GUYS

2009-01-23T18:57:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-01-23

Guys, I feel like I have totally failed you with this comic - I made half of it on the wrong layer and the rest is tragic history. And also additional generic excuses.
But next post I promise magic pony parades. I SWEAR.

IAMF page 5

2009-01-20T14:59:00.000-08:00

I hate the game of Mouse Trap

2009-01-19T18:49:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-01-19
this is based on a true story
I do not understand how that game is still being made and sold.

IAMF page 4

2009-01-14T14:57:00.000-08:00

Fancy schmancy

2009-01-13T21:13:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-01-13
I get this weird sense of accomplishment everytime I finish a drawing - it's kind of neat.
I figure if I keep drawin' - i'll keep needing that "high". Then at some point I can figure out how to paint in photoshop and it will be totally rad to the max.

IAMF page 3

2009-01-12T14:56:00.000-08:00

BONERTRON 2000 - this was way funnier in my head

2009-01-11T18:33:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-01-11
these punchlines are garbage
*giggle*

Oh yeah!

2009-01-10T12:56:00.000-08:00

oh MARMALADE - busy week, I think. I drew some comics but I have no way of turning them into the digital filth so desired by many. By many I mean not so many. *You* are the only one reading this.

IAMF page 2

2009-01-02T14:41:00.000-08:00

fat boi comix

2009-01-02T11:20:00.000-08:00

By keirbot at 2009-01-02
this is how I regain my misspent youth

IAMF

2009-01-01T23:32:00.000-08:00

So I've decided to post an OLD COMIC that I made about ...3 years ago? I make no guarantees of its quality. It was designed to be xeroxed, (hence the b+w and halftones) but I only ever made about 3 copies.

Here is the title page.

Here we go.